Published On: January 7, 2022Categories: InsightsTags: , , , ,

To forgive is something I have been told to do throughout my whole life, but hadn’t truly experienced the magic that lies within the action of forgiving until recently. 

About 7 years ago, I had started experiencing a lot of suppressed anger that started expressing outward towards myself and the people I love without warning or control over the hold it had on me.  The feelings behind the anger was resentment, regret, guilt and shame.  At the time that these feelings surfaced I became confused of why I was feeling such pain.  This made me curious. 

Within that curiosity, the search began.  The search of what I needed so I could release the suffering that held me prisoner to living my best life.  I needed answers.  To get the answer you seek you must find your question.  I knew my suffering came from negative emotions, but what I did not know is what triggered those emotions. “What am I holding onto that triggers negative emotions?” 

I sat with this question for some time and started practicing being the witness of these negative emotions instead of getting lost within the fury.  This took a lot of practice, but with commitment and stillness I was able to see what had a hold on me.  I was imprisoned by my past and the painful actions performed by others and myself.  I was pretty shocked how the memories of the past still haunted me when I thought I had let them go, but did I truly let them go? Or was I just stuffing them down?  Again I became curious. “How do we let go of the pain from the past?” This is when I realized that I must take action, not just say I’ve let it go, but actually take action of forgiving.  This is easier said then done. 

Forgiveness is a process.  The process of allowing yourself to be at peace with what has previously caused you pain and the willingness to release all negativity you might be holding onto towards yourself and/or others. 

This arouse another important question: “how do I come to a place of peace with all this hurt I have afflicted and had been afflicted on me?” Again I became curious, this time my curiosity was on the reason for the action that brought me pain.  When I was able to sit with the WHY, I was able see myself in others and the pain they may have endured in their life.  With this something beautiful developed inside me and that was compassion.  I started feeling compassion towards myself and those that had harmed me.  Once I sat in the seat of compassion my body started to unweight as the tears fell.  These tears fell not from sadness but of love.  With each tear came a release and when the last tear fell, I knew I had experienced forgiveness. 

Since this experience I have been able to open up more to love towards myself and in my relationships.  I am no longer a victim, but an empowered being. 

I tell this story for one main reason and that is the feelings that stand in the shadows of anger are toxic.  Resentment, regret, guilt and shame are negative feelings that push against the need to forgive and are like poison in our veins.  They are the precursor of disease and hold us back from being our best self 

Take your life back and step out of the past and into the present.  Become curious of your emotions that make you feel dark and heavy, ask those important questions, take action and find compassion in your heart. 

Forgiveness is not forgetting, it is accepting that it did happen and now it is done!! 

Best insight I can give is that COMPASSION is in our best interest!  When we can see others as ourselves is when we can step into the seat of compassion, where the power of forgiveness arises from the depths of our being and releases us from our anguish. 

If you or those you know struggle with working through the process of forgiving please share and feel free to reach out for guidance.  

#KellySmileyHealth #smileyquotes #smileyinsight #alignyourself